Stepford Knives

So recently, one of Matt’s close guy friend got engaged. It was quick and kind of hit us all out of left field but hey, he is a 30-something year old man and is entitled to do what he wants. After all, it is his life- his decisions. Right?

Well, being the kind person I am I tried to welcome her into the group with ease. I felt if she was comfortable and felt apart of the group, Matt’s friend would be happy. Therefore, I extended my hand out to her hoping to find something in common we can build a lasting friendship on…..

Let me stop here. Before I continue I must confess this girl is a rather young one. Twenty-two with a child and now getting married. You can all remember where your mind was at twenty-two right? How arrogant and naive you were. How you had no clue about life yet somehow you were the elite of scholars and philosophical mastare of your generation. You remember how you were an adult and no one is going to alter, hinder or construe your beliefs. I know you can relate. I long pass those stubborn years of my youth and do not wish to return to those gullible ways but alas, it seems to find any common ground with her, I may just have to.

Anyways, this past weekend we celebrated what would be her twenty-second birthday. Matt and I were both invited to the party so we showed up a bit late but still gift in hand. When we arrived, we quickly noticed the average age group seemed keen on the octogenarian range, which was strange for a young woman only a day shy of twenty-two. Even still, I made my way in and introduced myself to everyone but not without first grabbing a drink.

The birthday girl seemed to be no where in sight so I went, drink in hand, scowling the house for her. When I found her, she was upstairs in one of the children’s room with a ton of stank on her face. Apparently her friends didn’t show up, ergo the elders, and she was upset. Understandable.

I gave her the gift and asked her to come join us down stairs. From that point on everything seemed to go smoothly. I walked down stairs and sat down waiting for her. Well, as soon as she came down the entire ambiance of the room changed. She was yelling and from that moment on everything just went downhill.

The tension never left the party. There was a few times even, where I said out loud, “Well, this is awkward.” Yet none of it stopped. By the time 9PM came I was ready to leave, but Matt insisted on staying so I took the car and drove home. When I left Matt said the situation went from awkward to straight crazy. He probably stayed for another hour before texting me begging me to come get him.

Well, after I picked him up he told me somethings that really bothered me. It didn’t at first but as time grew on the non-issue turned strong issue.

The first non-issue turned strong issue was the birthday girl’s mom. She kept slapping Matt’s ass after I left and even at one point announced she was driving him home. I mean not even an hour prior I met this lady, and by lady I mean not that much older than us (39) but still borderline over our age group. I had shots with this lady. I complimented her hair and told the birthday girl her mom is awesome. Yet the Bitch is trifling. She waits until after I leave to hit on Matt. Like she don’t give no fucks. Then to top it off the birthday girl asks Matt if he was in love with me, and why he was in love with me.

Like wtf kind of questions are those?!

This is a girl I extended my hand out to. A girl I snapchatted with. A girl I opened up to and befriended even though she was no where on my level. I feel betrayed. I honestly do not know what she meant by her questions but the fact that her mom was acting like a sloppy ass home wrecker and her asking those questions. I just don’t feel good about it all.

I don’t know if I should bring it to her attention, or just let it go…. Naw fuck that. I’m bringing it to her attention tomorrow.





4 thoughts on “Stepford Knives

  1. Some people truly don’t give a fuck. It sounds like a weird situation all around though. Either both the mom and the birthday girl were after Matt, or the birthday girl was wing-manning for her mom. Either way it’s kinda fucked up, and clearly neither of them cared that he was in a relationship or had any concern for you at all.

    This doesn’t seem like someone worth pursuing a friendship with.

    On a personal note, my girlfriend’s mom has made more than one pass at me, even going so far as to try to kiss me one day which lead to this awkward thing in the driveway where I’m moving my face from side to side and she’s chasing it back and forth with her lips puckered. I ended up side stepping her and moving in for a hug, then stepping back a few steps. Apparently this is something her mom has done for as long as my girlfriend has been dating. It’s weird and her mom is completely oblivious to how inappropriate it is. Or maybe just doesn’t give a shit. We don’t have the best relationship with her parents anyway.

    So how did attention bringing go?

    Liked by 1 person

    1. People really don’t give fucks anymore. I haven’t spoken to her yet. I have been busy trying to find a worthy graphic designer. My last one did a shit job and then after leading me on for two weeks gave me some half ass logo that was nothing that i wanted. I asked for a particle refund and he like went off on this diatribe about how I didn’t know what I wanted when clearly in all of our email exchanges I kept giving him pictorial images of what I was looking for and he would give me unsymmetrical crap back. Then I told him to keep the $25 cause it isn’t worht arguing over and he has to bring up the ONE time we went to go eat and he paid for my food. WOW. Fucking egomaniac. UGH.


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